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Monday, May 19, 2008

Sex with one leg still in your pants.

This explains how the deed is done most of the time in our house. With a house full of preteens and teens, there is no more disturbing thought than being caught by your kids, in the act.

Now, before you start feeling too sorry for my husband and his boring sex life, don’t feel too sorry for him. Often enough, we throw caution to the wind and have the time of our lives, so no need for sympathy.

I’m talking about the week to week, day to day process of ‘reconnecting’, as we like to call it. How many of you ‘reconnect’ with one ear open for the sound of footsteps of the child who, “can’t sleep” or “forgot to tell you one more thing before they go to sleep.” You know, the part where you freeze and say, “listen!”, just to make sure you don’t have an audience?

Our kids can barely stomach it when we hug and kiss in front of them. “Could you two please stop that or get a room?” is the constant refrain. They appreciate the fact, I’m sure, that we love each other and care enough to show affection, they would just prefer we do it out of eyesight of their weak stomachs.

When they are babies, it’s not about fear of being caught, more of the hassle of being interrupted, but when they reach a certain age, fear of being caught and having to explain just what the hell was going on, is limiting, to say the least.

We have many stories of being caught when they were young toddlers and being able to skirt out of the embarrassment with a short explanation, but those days are gone. If we happen to get caught now, we would have some ‘splaining to do as to how we could do something like that in the same universe in which they live!!

There are so many varying opinions on how to deal with this in families. Some people just make it known they are going to have ‘quiet’ time as a couple and everyone knows what that means! ‘giggle, giggle’. Others keep it completely secret and don’t even show affection around their kids – this seems strange to me. We fall somewhere in between, I guess. But the day we can actually undress and not have to leave one leg still in our pants will be……let’s see……liberating!

If you're willing to share, I'd love to hear your thoughts.


Country Girl said...

Just came across your blog, I will be back!
Cute post! I am with you. We show affection to each other in front of the kids but do not announce "quiet time". Our kids are quite young and go to bed at a decent hour and they are in school during the day.

*~*Cece*~* said...

I remember the days of being "caught" by a toddler. We didn't have a lock on our bedroom door back then b/c we didn't want to chance our oldest (and only at the time) ever locking herself in our room. Its not until this past year or so that we FINALLY got a bedroom lock now that the girls are 6 & 10!

But as for "reconnecting" its hard w/us b/c Mister leaves for work at 1am, so he's in bed by 9pm at the latest w/only 3.5 hours of sleep. So we've got to wait til the weekend or he'll go to work sleep deprived & I don't like to do that to him. I look forward to the days he doesn't have to start work til like 4am then we have time to fool around and he still gets a bit of sleep.

Oh & we're totally affectionate all the time. We're the couple that can sit on the couch, watching TV and be holding hands or touching in some way. Our kids know nothing else but this from us. And in turn they're very affectionate children.

Anonymous said...

This is a big issue in my house. We live in a single story, ranch style home that is only 1000 square feet. The walls are paper thin and there's only about forty feet between our bedroom and the girls' rooms. When they were little, it didn't matter, but now that they are 14 and 12 and no longer crash into deep sleep at 8:30 at night....well...it's a problem.

Our one and only sure fire fix is having my mother nearby. If worse comes to worse I simply call up Mom and tell her that the girls are coming over for awhile because Mr. Clean and I need a "date".

Otherwise we're relagated to late, late nights or early, early mornings...neither of which work well for me.

When those children aren't here? I have a feeling the neighbors can hear us because it's no holds barred!

Ang said...

I'm sure as my kids get older this will be more of a problem, since the oldest at 9 is just starting to get that "something is goin' on in there" when we disappear or in the middle of the night when she was probably awakened by not a very good attempt at being quiet!

We've always been pretty affectionate also, mostly because when we started going out he was active duty Navy so we'd get a weekend here or there to make up for weeks or months of being apart. I also come from a lovey, huggy family and someone is always hangin' on someone else, lol.

Being affectionate to each other when the kids are around usually means one kid or the other is trying to smush their way in the middle , but we can usually find a way to disappear for a little bit as long as they are engrossed in a movie or playing int the backyard, etc, so time of day doesn't matter.

Probably our most used phrases are "extracurricular activity" and "go fold laundry" but I think we're a bit more active than average, lol, so we have a bunch of clue phrases that my kids will probably die of embarrassment as they get older and figure them out.

Yes, door locks and music for the kids at night definitely are in order in our house. :-D

Kat said...

Oh man. Our last "encounter" was rushed at the last 3 minutes because we heard our kid wake up and had to get done before he came banging on our door!